If you came here today for something interior design related, today's post is not for you. You can go back and read my post from last Thursday and try rearranging your room. Rest assured I'll be back in a couple days with something excitingly interior-related. This is about the big stuff. This is about the life stuff. This is about being fired up and feeling alive and bright with all you love and hold close and dream about. This is about owning what you do in your one short life on this magical disaster of a planet. Still with me? OKAY!
Every time someone asks me what I do, I feel an instant flush come over my cheeks, and I can feel all the blood leaving my body straight through my feet. I get cold and clammy and my mouth dries up as I scramble around thinking to myself, "I could say I'm an artist but that will lead to more questions...or someone asking me to draw them a tattoo...or someone telling me about how they, 'literally can't even draw a stick figure...' or someone telling me they wish they could just play all day, like art is a fun, carefree pursuit..." or my least favorite of all of the replies, the dreaded, "yes, but what's your job?"
Why is it that people love to define you not by your life's work, but by your life spent working for someone else? Why do people like to define themselves this way? I don't do what I do for a paycheck. I don't live and breathe and eat and sleep my day job. My day job is hopeful means to an end, to getting to do anything I want.
I've started replying to the question, "So, what do you do?" with the words, "I'm an artist! I make rugs!" and I've started to feel confident and excited. I've started to own it. When people ask me about my day job, I write it off. What I do, is my life's work.
What fuels you? What is your big, beautiful, messy, exciting life thing? What do you wake up for every morning? Start telling people it's what you do and you might start believing it is. That's really why I started nykimakes and this blog, to live all my passions and hold myself accountable. I hope you can find that too.